Side by Side

to my beloved brother who has changed me outwardly a hundred times and taught me a million unspkoen lessonss. To you, i say thanks.

second and lastly born
doomed to willingly follow in shadows
honored to stomp in footprints
because i know the trail is heading towards breathtaking
we walked side by side
for 16 years your legs were longer
i was never meant to keep up, but i tried
i ran full sprint next to your strolling stride
soon you veered right
i stumbled left
but we still walked parallel
close enough to talk in fact
this is the path of brothers
most paths cross
some fork
others look like figure 8’s
ours is boring
we are unpredictably certain
you are always there when my eye misses the rock, but my foot meets it
you have two arms to rescue this faller
and yet, more valued than the safety net
your secure hand grasping these gritty, brown palms
careful of the fresh scrapes
and sometimes you go further than expected
you cry for my wounds
gather the tears in your bowl shaped hands and wash these cuts
sometimes it stings

and we can’t drink your tears, because we don’t like the bitterness
so we’ve always packed provisions
your bag stuffed with courage for two
i shared sandwiches and humor
we were always prepared but never boy scouts, just cubbies.
during the rough nights, when the cold, divorced air clung to our lungs
and we couldn’t seem to get the pain out of our hands
we made a fire that melted it all to our backside
and we opened up and warmed the inside
our conversations were sometimes staring up,
dreaming of stars the arizona skyline smothered with purple hands,
but we’d reflect on the sunsets
orange and pink whispering hope for tomorrow
those nights we pitched tents
played cards by firefly light or the glow of a Suns game
brother, we needed that tent.
we deserved that tent
God gave us that tent to protect us from the violence outside

and now 3,000 mile apart we walk shoulder to shoulder, still talking
sometimes less often, but you’re still right there
i feel you when i pray, watch a baseball game or give advice
and we will continue because experience has carved out this path
etched out side by side futures in life-like dirt

so may we walk side by side today, brother